


Poor Sam

by orphan_account



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-10
Updated: 2013-02-10
Packaged: 2017-11-28 19:46:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/678213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Kili ends up in Slytherin and he hates it.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> For a prompt at the kink meme:
>
>> Back in the days of the founders, teenage Gandalf went to Hogwarts, ...along with Radagast and Saruman.
>> 
>> I just want to see those three in an HP crossover teen AU or something.
> 
> Which I misread (and I am eternally sorry for, OP) and ended up with this instead. I'm working on a second part that actually DOES follow the prompt better. I'm sorry. Again. *headdesks* 

Kili ends up in Slytherin and he hates it.

Not because he doesn’t fit in, but because Fili’s a Gryffindor and a year ahead of him and they don’t see each other often.

At least he has company here, though. Dwalin’s a prefect in seventh year, and a friend of Thorin. Nori’s here, if he ever gets out of detention, at least. And there’s Bilbo, who’s in the same year as Kili.

Still, as nice as it is to know people or meet them, they aren’t Fili and Kili misses his brother something terrible.

Most people don’t sit at tables for other houses, but it has been three days since Kili managed to see his brother, and to him, that is an eternity. He finds the golden hair in the crowd and sits down next to him, raising an eyebrow at the first years who clearly only know Slytherins by their reputation that are glaring at his tie like it had personally offended them.

Fili just smiles and hands Kili his favorites, pouring him a glass of juice and asking how his classes are.

“Alright. That Potions professor with the gross teeth weirds me out, but the Herbology professor’s interesting.”

“And by interesting, you mean that you suspect he’s on drugs, right? And hey, at least they’re better than the Transfiguration professor. This poor Gryffindor named Sam was in my class last year, and he turned the poor boy’s owl into a toad. Only briefly, but still.”

“Well, at least he didn’t turn Sam into a toad.”


	2. Mushrooms

"Are those mushrooms, Radagast?" Gandalf rolled his eyes and resisted the urge to transfigure Saruman into a newt. He'd end up getting better and getting Gandalf in trouble anyway and it really wasn't worth the trouble it would cause.

Even though he weighed quite a bit more than a duck.

"Just herbs. Sebastian's been having some stomach problems lately and I thought it might help some," Radagast said, focusing on the sleeping hedgehog on his lap. Gandalf picked up his pipe and lit it, because the other option was nearly killing Saruman and the headmaster tended to frown upon that. Even if Gandalf plied him with muggle sweets.

"Herbs like Gandalf's?"

"Do I need to remind you, Saruman, that I found a potion to help with certain, ah, problems brewing yesterday? In _your_ cauldron?" Gandalf said, smiling slightly at the frown forming on Saruman's face.

"Do I need to remind you that you nearly transfigured a boy into a toad yesterday in your class? Samwise Gamgee's family could cause trouble for the school!"

"I turned his owl into a toad, not him. He was perfectly fine. Mostly. It's not like he grew gills, after all." Gandalf paused and smiled to himself.

Hmm, gills. Now there was an idea.


End file.
